Daddy, I've Got Cider in My Ear...

Hideki Matsui got married yesterday.

This was apparently about a week after he made bets with both Derek "Sky Masterson" Jeter and Bobby "Nathan Detroit" Abreu that he would marry before either of them.

But it seems to me that in focusing on Jeter's and Abreu's sticky earlobes, the media have missed the real story here — Matsui's new bride is apparently a cartoon character.